What if????!!!!

I am all of a sudden reminded of this Tamil movie 12B. It was actually speaking a movie with a different script but didn’t click well with the audience. It captures two ‘lives’ of the hero. One where he misses a bus and one where he actually gets into the bus. Yes the question there again is ‘what if?’ It is amusing to think how it would have been if things were otherwise.(Guess this surprise break from routine is really making me ‘Think’ lol)

Life does not always give you a choice. It seems at times that this life too short or rather too small for the word ‘hate’. I have discovered that when you are left with no choice you kind of disconnect yourself from what you truly want and all that is left is compromise. That is when you tend to pose this question to yourself. ‘What if things were otherwise?’ Like someone rightly said, “When you have to make a choice and you don’t make it, that is in itself a choice.” Some times you cant’ have what you are longing for even if you sacrifice everything else for it.

Some situations in life make you wish to go back to how it was before. To bring back those memories and moments. To walk through the same ways yet again and to dream those dreams once again. I am just wishing for something like the rewind button in a music player. Don’t feel the need of the ‘shift delete’ button anymore. If you could actually get there and change or correct things which led you to where you are this moment. Quite a realistic wish I see :)

Hariharan sir has always amazed me with his soul stirring voice. ‘kaash’ remains an all time favourite. This particular song did not get noticed when compared to the title track of the album. Mesmerizing is what I can call this track ‘Jhoom le’ from the album ‘Kaash”.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dEKibg7nhi0

This one song for all those memories that I want to bring back ..those moments and those smiles…those smiles and tears..those hopes and dreams dreamt. Life indeed takes twists and turns. Sometimes you long to get back right there and might not really be able to do that. Doing so you kind of end up living these two rather strange ‘lives’ simultaneously and to end up in a state of bewilderment. But yes the truth is there is only this moment..there is only this..or else life is yours that you will miss..so make the most of it.. walk in the rain.. feel the breeze.. dream of dreaming yet again..

“Where ‘you’ used to be..there is a void in my world.. I see myself constantly walking around that during day time and falling in at night.. And I am glad then I didn’t know it all would end the way it all would go.. Am afraid you don’t want me to say anything. These words may stay forever in my heart locked inside..may be there are words locked inside you too.. May be I will never know.. what if???!!!”

Let go..!!!

Sometimes it is always good to let go of certain things and certain people… But as some one rightly said once “ Letting go does not always mean giving up, but rather accepting the fact that there are things that cannot be…” You at times tend to ask the question ‘ Why not?’ but yes it doesn’t offer an answer always…This very moment is the only thing you have that is certain… so hold on to it.. rather than getting lost in the blurred picture of the thing called ‘ future’

The title track from ‘Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam’ was one such song. It has so beautifully captured the art of ‘letting go’. But still in the unknown corners of your mind, there are things that we never want to let go off, people we never want to leave behind and walk away…but at times..it stays locked in there…safe and sound.. Ismail Durbar has so stunningly composed the entire album that is so soulful and full of life.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1YtQpePwUEg&feature

I have always felt that the logic to get to know people better is to trust them for who they are …but always we trust them for whom we want them to be and in the end we remain disheartened. It is when we let go.. We all are responsible..! Although we won’t be able to stop the worst from happening… we are all responsible for our attitude towards the misfortunes that darken our lives..We can choose to sit deserted or decide to rise from the loss and cherish the most precious gift we have …life itself!

“Here I stand.. seeing you walk away…Well..now on I will never have a place to call my very own.. That’s all right you..my ‘life’..you are my home…”

PS: Post dedicated specially to my priceless treasure..for always making me smile.. and for being there unconditionally! : )

To be..!!!

Change..!!!…life is all about changes. There comes a point when you feel this is it and am gonna be living in this way. But not yet…there comes an unexpected change…and again the circle goes on.

It feels strange at times. When you are taken off from all your much used ways and habits. Just a strange new world...!!! Where you are just by yourself…. trying to see how life has changed and how things around you have changed. Slowly but certainly you start getting used to the changes.. and move on with the flow. Sometimes you yearn for it..most of the times it comes to you. That is the very unique thing about the concept of change..

Sudden diversions are sometimes really good. It gives you a lot of time to be with yourself and understand the person in you. But still you tend to cling on to those memories and start breathing life..all over again…Everything around you seems to have changed..but you!

Sometimes you yearn for a whiff of fresh air. ‘Akale’ was one such masterpiece from my all time favourite Shyamaprasad Sir. The title track will do wonders to you. With a touch of Beethoven’s Symphony, the entire album has that divinity attached to it which will help you let go off everything else haunting you..just let your mind wander into the unknown heights and depths..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQXciqVmjDg

“ I didn’t ask for it to be over, but then again, I never asked for it to begin. For that’s the way it is with life, as some of the most beautiful days come completely by chance. But even the most beautiful days eventually have their sunsets..”

Nouvelle Vie!!!

The title is just a reflection of the new craze that I have developed…this love for French as a language : ) Life has given me this 'surprise' break from all the madness and from all the daily to do lists…so thought would make the most of it and do something off the track…

Have been diving deep in to songs..movies and a lot more of it.. and having some realizations that have helped me move on..and face everything with my much clichéd 70 mm smile..I have learned to hold fast on to my dreams and hopes ..as someone once said..if dreams die..life is life a broken winged bird that cannot fly! It just seems hard at times.. but for every dark night there is a bright sunrise awaiting you.. and the things that you fear are just undefeatable not by their nature but by the way you look at it. The same old logic of seeing half glass empty/full : )

“Nouvelle Vie” means “New Life” and this particular song from the wonderfully made movie ‘Phir Milenge’, which gave out a fantabulous message, reminds us of the fact that it is never too late to start living a new life. There is always a new way to look at things…if you don’t have all the things you want ..you need to be grateful for those things as you don’t want them in your life actually. You can still do without : ) “Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.”I agree to this two hundred percent!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6XD71iDZtT0

Conquering any obstacle has always given me a secret joy. It has always meant pushing back a boundary line and adding on to one’s liberty. It just meant not to be dragged into silence and never let anyone define life for you but yourself. Knowing this, still most of us live life without making a stand, contented to blend into the background of self-rendering nothingness, and when looking back feel contented at our mediocre accomplishments. No one remembers the drops but the ocean…

“When you have come to the edge Of all light that you know And are about to drop off into the darkness Of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or You will be taught to fly”

Ending notes!!!

The title inspired from a show which used to appear in a Malayalam channel years back. The only serial I used to wait for just for the title track and then just get lost in the very feel of it. ‘Shamanathalam’ , directed by the much respected and talented one, Shyamaprasad Sir, was not just any other serial. It had this so close to life feel.. soul stirring music and BGM..

How I wish everyone could understand ‘Malayalam’ as a language just to understand the depth and intensity of this song and the out of the world lyrics. But music speaks this universal language which every soul can comprehend.. One song that captures the various seasons of your heart. Chithra chechi’s best non film song anytime. If not for Manu aka Chai D Celeb I would not have been reminded of this fantabulous song after so many years. Thanks a trillion Manu and thanks to those amazing memories.. Have been listening to this nonstop for almost four days now and still can't get enough of it...serene..divine..haunting..that is 'Manveenayil' for you...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WM42tTVLciU

The whole flow of the song just makes it stand out from the rest of the many million songs that we hear and forget. There is not much jazz. Just the right amount of BGM that is required where the song and the lyrics are given priority and not the kind of magic ‘software’ plays these days.

One song which will bring you back to those memories which you would have believed that you have actually let go off.. but still are residing somewhere in the unknown depths of your soul..It actually feels like getting up from a long deep sleep and you still find yourself at a place from where you had once ‘moved on’..But when you try touching that reality once again you kind of realize that it was again nothing but just a dream..

“The tender word forgotten, The letter you did not write.. What moves me about? Perhaps this is our strange and haunting paradox..that we are fixed and certain only when we are in movement”

Celebration of motherhood!!!!

It is perhaps one of the most beautiful feelings in the world. It is a feeling that can only truly be understood by those that experience it…Someone once said.. “When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child…”

Started getting this feeling exactly a year before when I first saw her pitter patter her ways into my life. I felt so content…felt that.. well..now there is something that I have to take care of..pamper..nurture and see growing up…It has been said that we need just three things in life.. Something to do, something to look forward to and someone to love

One year went like one second…and today when I look back I have a lot of memories associated with her…more memories than I was a thousand year old…some awesome ones..some good ones…some not so good ones…but I hold each and every one of those so close to my heart.

It was a fantabulous journey and I am looking forward to many more years of growing up with her…Happy Birthday to you!! Yes Serenity is an year old today (28th March) and I am just feeling time and again like a mixed fruit jam…lol. Just would want to say a BIG thanks to all of you out there who have been bearing with my loud thinking all this while.. Thanks a trillion…

Karthik- For inspiring me to start ‘Serenity’ you will be my Encyclopedia musica for all the years to come
Ettan- For being that gentle breeze of my life all these years..stay blessed
Mejoettan- For keeping the music in me alive..
Sandipettan and Mamtachechi- For making me believe that unconditional love exists even now
Praji aka Luttu- For being my pillar of strength..my best friend for life
Manu aka Chaai D Celeb aka the thoughtful one- For keeping my spirits alive calling my posts ‘K’ serial …lol..You are one amazing friend
Gulfu aka my web guru- For all those html edits..comments and pep talks…thanks pal
My favourite butterfly- For stopping me from deleting ‘Serenity’ one of those days .. Love you for this and for many other reasons
Gopi aka the sweetest one- I don't believe you actually edited your about me on orkut and put up a note about 'Serenity' am still smiling with my eyes filled

Vaava... Maash..Govind kuttan, Rachi,Sonia, Tintu,Ratheesh ettan,chakku, and a lot many out there who have been religiously sending me feedback and suggestions..for always being the wind beneath my wings..A simple ‘THANKS’ is too small a word to express what it means to me. I have known that words can never replace feelings….

These songs go out for all of you..my angelic parents and for all the wonderful people out there..just a few picks from my favourite lists..

'Etho vaarmukilin' from the Malayalam movie 'Pookkaalam varavaayi'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AY0ZBjBvKyg

'Sutrum vizhisudar thaan' from the Tamil movie 'Kandukonden Kandukonden'
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k_bVG1fluw8

'Luka chupi' from the Hindi movie 'Rang De Basanti'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iB-PMhP7NRk

'Thendrale' from the Tamil movie 'Kaadhal Desam'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyBmG9ZZnLM

'Kannukku mayyazhaku' from the Tamil movie 'Puthiyamukham'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LO9AemTUNb0

“Since I grew tired of the chase…..And search, I learned to find….
And since the wind blows in my face…I sail with every wind….”

Let there be rain!!!!

When you close your eyes and listen….drops of rain do speak volumes. I have always been madly in love with rain… It just feels awesome how it washes the dust of everyday life and how it breathes new life in to everything and everyone. It freshens up your spirit and the rain drops seem to play a sweet refrain. It paints a lot of amazing pictures in your mind…

It is no surprise to me that hardly anyone tells the truth about how they feel. But there is an element of surprise to it…..like summer rains… It is a beautiful creation. Kind of brings out the mystery in you and me. Some songs and some people are like summer rain. They come into your life when you least expect them.

Like Tagore once said….“That I exist is a perpetual surprise which is life…”And I always have felt that the best things in life are always unexpected… for almost all the best things that came into my life were unexpected. And I believe that you will truly understand the essence of life when you allow the unexpected to happen…

This one song will fall into your life like those first few drops of rain.. The Tamil movie “May Maadham” was well made and all the songs were much talked about. But of all, “Yenmel Vizhunda” stands out just because of the very freshness it brings along with it and the very same volumes it speaks through the magnificent lyrics.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdFAbPbgHmY

“Eventually, all things merge into one, and a river runs through it. The river was cut by the world's great flood and runs over rocks from the basement of time. On some of the rocks are timeless raindrops… I am no Poet here; my pen's the spout where the rain water of my eyes run out.”